Down Among the Big Boys

In Peter McDougall’s television play, Down Among the Big Boys, a man walks in to a bar and asks for a whisky and a half pint please, pal. The whisky is quickly served from the optics, and he downs it in one while the barman pours the half pint. As the barman rings up the drinks, the half pint is in the process of being downed as well. One-sixty four. The man confesses that “Mate, ah canny pey fur this … Ma heid was burstin and a wis desperate. …” The barman steps round the bar – by now everyone else there is watching – and, after a pause for expected violence, rips the jacket off the man: “When you can pay for your drink, you can have your jacket back.” At which point another customer shouts, “Ho, mate. Ah’ll have a large vodka then, eh?” and throws his denim jacket over the bar.